敗 犬 |
I found your fingerprints on my shattered heart. I'm a lousy spider, entangled in a love web. Love is an addiction I can't quit. Love isn't a science, you can't calculate the feelings. Can a once in a lifetime love find a second chance? Sometimes when you love someone you gotta forget your own happiness. And remember theirs. When love and determination work together, expect a masterpiece. |
Friday, July 31, 2009
fop ftw!
7/31/2009 11:52:00 pm
freaking tired. just got back from FOP.but the session was awesome (must do in the zao xiah style) how to STOP worrying? (sermon for FOP today) Specify your worries Take actions of your worries Offer a prayer up to God Place your trust in God Never worry about things you can do something about and the things you can't. din elaborate, if you want to know can ask me personally I will share the word w you! :D the word by Pastor Mark Conner. it is just in season man! love the word! abt my day. I alept at 3am today because I was doing my Nyaa stuff. actually could have slept by 2 but cause I edit some stuff so took longer. much much longer. in abs terms 1 hour is just ONE HOUR but in sleeping hours term, 1hr makes a hell lot of diff, honestly. and that was what got me thinking about life and the sucky things both chong and I wanted to use similar stuff for our skills since our skills are the same but then its like our sources are the same then very suspicious. so I had no choice but to cut away precious information of my freaking report the feeling totally sucks. but its better than we discuss and end up both of us unhappy because I know we will end up arguing. and we will waste more time deciding on who to cut what. I am damn sick of arguing. I dont want another case of I-am-too-demanding. and I dont expect him to give in also. lesson learnt from wed: if you don't expect, you won't be disappointed thats why I just scraped mine and let him keep his. it wont kill me I know. but it killed my precious sleep initially I was fine but then I started to think about stupid stuffs like: who cares about what xueting is doing at 2am in the morning. who gives a damn about xueting being tired then I just keep on thking about unhappy stuffs but I consoled myself and told myself that it is better than we hand up similar work and end up both of us get suspected for sharing information. then both of dont get the award because no one wants to give in so why not just sacrifice an hour for honor? and I consoled myself that being nice to a friend is part of service learning too. which is crucial for NYAA :\ anyway went to slp at 3 then woke up at 640 dissolved 2packs of coffee mix into half cup water conc of coffee: 5000mol/dm3 my stomach like went dead la. cause it was empty ): had a bad day in school cause my stomach was aching due to the stupid coffee. vomitted in school during break. GROSS GROSS GROSS :\ after sch met EBC then ate buffet at LAOBEIJING (: i like the waiter there :D damn freaking cute can! TONG ZHI! (: we ate until we full like no mother. LIKE CAN EXPLODE LOR then we went to kallang and went fop la. walked to kallang w ebc (:
watched WHY WHY LOVE. stupid show. LIKE BOF. WHY MUST 2 GOOD FRIENDS/ SIBLINGS FALL FOR THE SAME PERSON. sucks man, but to all my friends out there. i believe in the friends-come-first policy, so if you tell me you like someone, I wont fall in love with that person. i think most girls have this principle. i guess it is impt for a stable f/s. thats the best assurance a girl can give to her bff or her good girl-friends. i bet this new show will start my tear glands so I am damn dtmed nt to watch it. SOAPY DRAMAS SUCK ): Wednesday, July 29, 2009
balanced day (:
7/29/2009 11:29:00 pm
ok had math lect today AND I DIN FALL ASLEEPi have found new motivation in math lecture (: heh but the main thing is vivien sits beside me now and she stops me from slping then econs tut was funny la. i thk miss lioe too cute :\ GP WAS TOO FUNNY LIAO LA. i must stop bitching abt Mr Wee srsly. like bitch in a funny way. I keep bitching and him and Zara clothes WHAT THE HELL RIGHT HE FREAKING WEARS A ZARA TO SCHOOL his top $89.90 leh! WAHLAU EH $89.90 can pay for my prom and maybe but some kfc to eat :\ break was kinda fun la (: ate with vien hy tyas and chong ok it was funny chong and I quarrel during gp regarding some stuff which reminds me I HAVE TO FREAKING SQUUEZE OUT $ FROM MY PATHETIC ALLOWANCE TO HAVE A HAIRCUT. suck la i freaking need a haircut and i freaking have no money. the world sucks honestly. SIANS MONDAY NEED TAKE CLASS PHOTO my fringe is cnnt make it pls. sian. I CANT PART W MY MONEY. needs a blessing IMMEDIATELY ): anw back to break la. totally sabo-ed hy abt brian. HAH. I own. tyas scared the shit out of me ok. chong: soup damn hot xt: blow it la. blow it. my soup damn hot also chong: you want me to blow for you? tyas: you all talking abt blowjob ah! chong and xt chokes!!!! like honestly :P then chem tut was boring la. WAHLAU KNS VTEO BLUFF US! she told us gt org chem test then dun have lor :\ BASKET OF GOOODS. but the lect inorg test was suck la after tt had econs remedial. miss lioe QUITE funny la. she is cute to a certain extent. discuss the policies that make miss lioe cute. OK I M NT MAKING SENSE. then took 186 home... talked to someone today.. thanks for sharing so much with me. I never knew so much about you.. and now you keep my DEEP DARK SECRET! didn't know we had so much in common. and it is great to know that someone is kinda in the same boat with me.. thought abt YOU today. actually I think about you often. too often in fact. I thought about the stuff that someone said.. and I realised that I wont become what I am today for someone else. cause you're the first and you will be the only person that made me feel this way. the suckiest point? I dont even know when the hell I started liking you. but i know one thing for sure.. I dont thk I can get out of this trap. I dont thk I can ever look you in the eyes and feel nothing at all. No, no matter where you are in the room. as long as you are near me, I cannot be myself. I pay so much attention to you I think I forgot I existed. you mean alot to me, thats why when you left, I felt that I lost a part of me. you're not an addition to my life, you're MY LIFE. but you will never ever ever understand. because YOU ARE FREAKING HAPPY now. Yes I can see. you're having everything which I couldn't give you and can never give you. you killed me the day you said you wanted out, the day you said you needed a break. I know we can never work out. and so many times I wanted to tell you what I really feel but I was so afraid of breaking what is left between us. which is essentially NOTHING. and so many times I wanted to tell myself to get on move on with life but I cannot. I just want you to know.. I never regretted becoming what I am today because of you. because you are different, you are SPECIAL. why? because.. only you can make me tear on a happy occasion only you can make me look at doughnuts and think of them as mickey house's head only you can make me call you on using my hp even though the bill explodes only you can make me run faster on the track by picturing you in front of me only you can make me smile to myself when I receive a sms from you, even though it is to ask about work & nothing else only you can make me fret and worry about your birthday only you can make me blush when I talk to my friends about you only you can make me feel that I am happy as long as I am with you only you can make me worry about you so much only you can make me weep in the middle of the night because you're not here anymore. I m gg to slp nw. gg to try and dream of you. if we have a happy ending. I'll slp forever. Monday, July 27, 2009
HOORAY
7/27/2009 08:19:00 pm
congrats to suat. she totally did her 2.4km with a new nice timing :Dlike faster than previously. LOL OMG LA. suat = me. double lol. BUT I M DAMN HAPPY. i know 2.4km can pass and maybe even keep improving but the main point is my freaking jump. i cant freaking jump even though i have legs. SUCKS mr foo tried teaching me how to jump today. i frigging suck ): nvm man. I MUST DO IT. all A except the freaking jump. I hate life. thanks to the frigging jump i can nvr get a gold in my life. STUPID JUMP. came home after sch today. LIFE IS BORING. listened to YOU BELONG W ME by TAYLOR SWIFT. i dunno why I m in love w this song. HAHA. the mv is so sweeeeeeeeeet la, HAH. LIKE IT WILL HAPPEN IN REAL LIFE. BASKET. fri gg out w EBC. yay ryan and yishi is love (: we haven had a ebc agm in ages. fri must eat till we die die die die die then drag our fat bodies to FOP (: i love EBC! and all my lovely t25 classmates :D maybe sch aint tt bad :p SO WHY CANT U SEE, YOU BELONG W ME Sunday, July 26, 2009
bestie <3
7/26/2009 09:14:00 pm
I MISS YAP HUAN QING :D
Saturday, July 25, 2009
fragility.
7/25/2009 10:26:00 pm
you're so fragile it scares me sometimes - huanqing.haha. that was what bestie smsed me! it might b random for you all but yea it makes hell alot of sense to me. sian I am at home. SUCK LA. watching BOF agn. LIKE WHAT THE HELL. it's like the stupidest show on earth(ok thisi s so untrue). the point is its damn stupid to keep rewatching the thing la. LIKE HONESTLY. ZZZ but today de story damn mother sad ): ARGH. but abit slow huh. I watched tt like DAMN LONG AGOZZXX. I am in love with "Best In Me" from Blue. damn ancient I know :\ anyway have been actively in touch w bestie recently so I am damn happy (: YAY YAY YAY YAY YAY (: i finally felt what she felt last year. personal space is very important. Very very very important. Hanging out is good, but when I no longer feel happy around you. I will withdraw away. and yes it is the last thing I want. argh, I feel damn bad now ): gg to slp, dunwanna thk ): I slacked my day off today. SUCK SUCK SUCK. i deserve to fail and die. wt was msging me and she was studying at amk lib while I was slacking my day away. SIANS. i m too slack. I shld die. watching bof now. OMG SO SWEET. guess I cant escape it :\ SRSLY GG TO BATHE N SLP SOON. bof suck my brain la ): LIFE FREAKING SUCKS LA. I DUNWAN TO LIVE IN STUPID FAIRYTALE. so I only like Gu Jun Pyo's mother inside the whole freaking show, she is the mother one that is realistic. I shld be like her man :\ ok whatever happened to bathing :\ Thursday, July 23, 2009
its a cycle
7/23/2009 10:01:00 pm
i dunno to laugh or cry.i screwed up some timing regarding meeting kwan and on msn i was trying to explain and apologise then i said "i have nth to say" then on the other hand tim is apologising to me and he said "i have nth to say" alright man. I dunno what is this. its just so coincidental. sch ended at 1 today. nutty's bdae. gave her a great surprise (: thought abt what chongloon said.. I m a bit scared of some stuff ): dunwan it to be true. Honestly.. must do online bio test ltr. ARGH. mood status: confused. upset. scared. paranoid. SENSOR FAILED TO DETECT THE SLIGHTEST BIT OF HAPPINESS Wednesday, July 22, 2009
GD GAME
7/22/2009 08:48:00 pm
XT XT XT XT XT XT GD GAMEOMG I FELL DOWN IN SCH AGN DOING SBJ. NOW MY LEFT LEG KEEP BLEEDING IT KEEP KEEP BLEEDING ): i damn sian la, stupid man keep falling down! RAWR. break was fun la, kept talking crap. AND I SAW GBB! <3 HEHEHEHEHEEH gp lect was boring. then after sch went out and come home (: I M TIRED. just made pancakes (: Tuesday, July 21, 2009
Thking
7/21/2009 11:07:00 pm
sd was so boring I fell asleep and Mr lim was mean to me ):LIKE SO MANY PPLE SLPING U HAVE TO PICK ON ME. BASKET. JUST BECAUSE I M A COUNCILLOR. SHITZO. then chem lect overrun la :\ KBONG TALK DAMN LONG. gp boring though. talked abt animal rights. damn zz break was MADDENING. uncle haven refill his vinegar ): then bio lect I SLEPT AGN :\ I am devastated! How can I sleep! I should DIE :\ din slp through chem though was supposed to partner changyuan but miss teo partner me w hongyun instead she better nt thk like mr lim.
mr lim totally thk i broke w C to b with C then break with C to be with HY! like wth, MR LIM THKS I M DESPERATE. hah! I am just friendly -_- basket. anw after sch went scc! had fun with CI (: then went serene center w CI! first tym! installation was boring la. the funny thing was I was hitting brian THEN HIS MUM SAW AND WALKED UP TO ME. OMG LAAA sry BRIAN and MUM! hah! damn tired nao. just did laundry! ): why washing machine cnnt auto hang ); RAWR! shall go bathe and slp soon (: TML GOT PE. BASKET. Monday, July 20, 2009
itunes.
7/20/2009 11:39:00 pm
bad day in sch! SO DAMN SLEEEEEPY. I was knocked out during GP.but I must comment tt MR GABRIEL WEE look DAMN GD today (: I bet he had a nice weekend (as usual), haha. then maths tut was okay lurh. OMG HY DAMN SAD CAUSE HE HAD TO RUSH OFF to cut his hair. LIKE WTH!! kena caught for long hair :\ sch is freaking stupid. HONESTLY >=[ I M NT SENDING MY KIDS TO CJC. LIKE HONESTLY. I know wonghongyun will say "why not" IN THE DAMN ANNOYING TONE. hah, JINX :P anw had maths lect and then break. THE QUEUE FREAKING LONG like wth I din want to cut queue BUT in the end damn alot of pple cut my queue. basket, no more miss-nice-xueting from tml onwards! TML STEPPING DOWN AS COUNCILLOR LE. I WILL CUT QUEUE. anw had econs lect and chem tut. I SLEPT DURING ECONS (AS USUAL) chem was alright la, trying damn hard to catch up! basket ): then pe was boring. do the bloody 2.4km agn. BASKET BASKET BASKET. then go do abit of jump. i jump 170 today i guess? improvement la. all the tchers want me to do 200 and abv. how amny times must I repeat? LENGTH OF LEG IS NT PROPORTIONATE TO THE DIST JUMPED! argh. then I couldn't redeem my watermelon ice from hy cause I din jump over this block basket ): went home at 6plus. so frigging tired. lugging some pot :\ anw reset some itunes stuff and my record is gone my "Because I am stupid" from highest playcount of 144 dropped to 2. BASKET now I am damn sian and moooodless. Shall listen to some music and then slp TML GT INSTALLATION FOR THE 35TH! all the way 35th! I DUN LIKE THE NEW VP OF CI TOO. YEAH ITS ZACH CHAN. BUT WHO CARES. I HONESTLY DUN LIKE HIM. but whatever, dun need work under him so nvm (: I M TIRED. PANCAKES FOR BREAKFAST TML :D Sunday, July 19, 2009
Memories
7/19/2009 10:11:00 pm
happppppy :Dmet ting and abel :D we ate dinner at kfc with natural antioxidants :P anw, rmbed lis's party wrongly IT IS NEXT SAT NOT YTD!! I AM SUCH A BLUR ASS anw, yea went ting's hse to slp. abel too (: uncle abel CHEEKOPEK we ate seaweed chips! yummmy. and we bought mochi? and JELLY we made the jelly. so cooooool la :D and we bought $8 worth of gummies XD eat until rot la. slept at 230 woke up at 8 plus today. super late. chiong for svc. then met jasper. damn random la. at city hall. we weren't sure if it was each other. then eh asked damn loudly " are you suet theng?!" WAHLAU. i walked over to talk ot him then we chat for a while till he alighted at kallang. went for svc! in time for prayer meeting!! then svc and lunch with bff at bugis, went to bought jiayu's present :D then I so pro help her chooose the gift (: then went sf! though will be playing fhw today but no! we did flightphesy!! :D:D i rmbered earlier i was damn upset that i cldn't get in for emerge to play for the svc but someone told me tt its ok because i have more time to practice. which makes sense! i need lots of practice :D but sad cause BFF not here for sf today!! CAUSE HE GT SEMINAR TO ATTTTTEND ): but yea had fun then took bus home with felicia :D and i have been slacking since then. ARGH. SS501 IS TOO CAPTIVATING. KYH ILU. I m gg to bathe and slp sooooon. or nt tml slp in school ): nt very gd idea although i have been doing tt :\ back from bathing (: at 10:50pm! waiting for my hair to dry then I m gg to slp. I m damn knocked out ): I HATE SCH. ARGH BASKET. I thk I damn own today. but bff thinks I am evil. she too kind hearted alrdy (: Friday, July 17, 2009
Secret
7/17/2009 10:35:00 pm
ok I am damn emo now. IS MY FREAKING FAULT. shouldn't have CLICKED ON TT LINK ): I din want to look at that link anymore. I RLLY din want. But at least now I know sth.. I WAS SO STUPID. I shld have guessed ZZZ. so much for the unneccessary happiness. WHAT BULLSHIT. I am bullshit.I AM DAMN DAMN DAMN SIAN. thk I am gg to drink damn alot agn tml ): BASKET! hai, if life doesn't suck, then it isn't life! just saw weiliang's nick.. "when life gives you lemons, say 'bring it on bitch' :D " OWN SIAH. such a positive attitude towards life :P
ok Im gg to give myself 1hr to get over with my unhappiness. my one hr starts NAO. and I rlly like this song.. just the chorus. found it while trying to search for my mother song which hy made fun of.. I was singing this emo song before syf then he had to make fun of it and make me laugh during syf presents. BASKET :\ just saw this from some tv subtitle: "what him and I was just a pathetic dream. and the point is i dun wan to wake up from that dream. if he dont hurt me now i will nvr get out of it. now that he has hurt me so badly i will forget him completely. " YES IT IS SO TRUE ): here are the lyrics. 我们的爱情是秘密不能成立 就算我爱你也不能够说明 她在你身边逗你开心 我只不过让你歇斯底里 你就让我跟着你一起秘密 我们的事情说好不提起 让我们都能够清晰 你和她 是不变的 定律 低调
7/17/2009 09:22:00 pm
嬉笑 打闹 拥抱 留下了那么多开心合照 互相取暖依靠 熬过了最低潮 一起生活 也一起埋怨过 走过最好与最糟 我在心里想的不用说明 你知道 晨昏 日夜 颠倒 这房子突然没从前热闹 散落一地微笑 没有人去打扫 感情很微妙 再多付出也好 再多关心都徒劳 爱情从来就没有固定的味道 它最后停在哪里谁知道 我的难过是如此低调 因为不想打扰 我在寂寞的墙角 努力的对自己好 你用微笑回报 朋友或情人不重要 我的悲伤是如此低调 傻子才会哭闹 就算你发现也好 我想你一定会选择 假装不知道 只怕我自己的掩饰不够好 难到是我对我自己 不够好 ): this song mother mother mother sad ): and it really sucks. today really sucks. tml i will drink my liver away :\ i m staying up tonight for sth special (: i guess i just MISS YOU TOO MUCH :\ talking to kwannie nao. guess amkss friends are still THE BEST (: Thursday, July 16, 2009
UPSET ):
7/16/2009 10:29:00 pm
YOU CAN TURN MY WORLD UPSIDE DOWN REALLY.listening to emo like siao ): cried in sch today. i guess its the results and whatever that is happening ): life sucksPublish Post :D
7/16/2009 08:42:00 pm
MISSION ACCOMPLISHED :DWAHAHAH. HY AND I CHIONG 18 P.C IN 2HRS :D I SHALL REVEAL WHAT IS P.C TML (: I M DAMN HAPPPPPY NAO (: TML WILL BE A HAPPY DAY :D WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE Wednesday, July 15, 2009
I MISS YOU BADLY
7/15/2009 09:11:00 pm
I MISS YOU SO MUCH. IT HAS BEEN A YEAR SINCE WE LAST TALKED TO EACH OTHER PROPERLY. TALK THINGS THAT ARE OUT OF COUNCIL, TALK THINGS THAT ARE OUT OF SCHOOLWORK. I MISS ALL THE SILLY THINGS YOU DO TO ME, LIKE TEASE ME OR JUST LAUGH AT ME WITH THAT SMILE OF YOURS. I MISSED THE TIMES YOU CRIED IN FRONT OF ME, I MISSED THE TIMES WHERE I COULD BE THERE TO COMFORT YOU. IT'S OVER. ALL OVER. BUT I STILL MISS YOU LIKE CRAP. I WISH YOU ARE RIGHT HERE WITH ME. ILYJ.
just pondering
7/15/2009 08:17:00 pm
Sorry sorry blah blah blah.dan dan dan dalan dan dan dan.. I M ADDICTED TO THIS SONG :D today- yeah ready for my results. like mother lousy ): Bio (S) Chem (E) Maths (-) Econs (E) Gp (E) OK I PASSED MATHS but the main point is either S or E lor, ZZZ I damn sian la, mid yrs is like damn cui la -_- I dunno what to do anymore. and I am damn sad tt bestie might be gg Japan next yr during March ): but this yr bdae I will celebrate w you (: I dun mind staying over on the 4th then countdown together :D then I will be the first person you see on your bdae right? HINT HINT MUST INVITE ME OVER TO YOUR AWESOME HOUSE AGN =D then spam pics with ur macbk XD but next yr my bdae YOU WILL BE GONE. I think I am just emo, cause Su and Lis are leaving soon. And the point is THEY ARE LIKE THE BEST SENIORS IN CJC. they helped me during promos last yr and also helped with my projects :D this sat shld be going for lis's party though I am scared I will be out of place ): but I know some pple there :D then sat having svc and sf. so cnnt have cg outing w cg! I wna watch harry potter ): they're gg to watch it after svc. sucks man ): I think I'll just catch it or BUY (heheh) listening to some emo song that chong sent. ITS DAMN SAD. its like so tears inducing. when you're upset, just listen to it. it applies for people who just broke up or sth. yea, damn mother sad. was thking abt JIHOO on the way home. wasn't thking abt his hot face or anything. just thinking that in real life there are plenty of jihooS. hah, people who give up their rights to pursue a r/s because they value f/s more. I guess this is true. Sometimes I dunno whether it is good or bad that I don't cry as much as last tym when I am sad now. I dunno if I am genuinely fine or just suppressing my feelings. It's scary. At least when I cry, I let my feelings go. But when I dont, I just keep it all to myself. I might explode :\ But there is no point in feeling sad. you're alrdy attached, I shouldn't think about you anymore. you were my friend, you are my friend, you will always be just a friend. I am gg to live with it. it just sucks to know that I can no longer like you because it is just wrong ): and its is stupid and pointless. I should just move on with life, or maybe get a life first. Damn it, WHATEVER HAPPEN TO NOT EMO-ING. argh. I lost the battle agn ): emo lyrics for you and me ): 又来到这个港口 没有原因的拘留 我的心乘着斑剥的轻舟 寻找失落的沙洲 随时间的海浪漂流 我用力张开双手 拥抱那么多起起落落 想念的 还是你望着我的眼波 (chorus) 我不是一定要你回来 只是当又一个人看海 回头才发现你不在 留下我迂回的徘徊 我不是一定要你回来 只是当又把回忆翻开 除了你之外的空白 还有谁能来教我爱 又回到这个尽头 我也想再往前走 只是越看见海阔天空 越遗憾 没有你分享我的感动 (repeat chorus) 我不是一定要你回来 只是当又一个人看海 疲惫的身影不是我 不是你想看见的我 我不是一定要你回来 只是当独自走入人海 除了你之外的依赖 还有谁能教我勇敢 Tuesday, July 14, 2009
MOVIE
7/14/2009 09:22:00 pm
sch sucks!results sucks >=[ DAMN MOTHER MOTHER MOTHER SIAN had SD lesson, so stupid larh -_- then went for break and CCS helpout ): missed BIO lect ): went for maths tut. slp and slp :\ then chem lect and yea bio agn -_- finally lunch and then study at pac (: THEN MOVIE W CHONG!! 3D movie with the cool specs. OMG LAHHH! came home and dinner. I M TIRED talking with nutty now (: and bestie too! but she is bathing! sexxay! I DUNWAN TO GO TO SCH TML >=[ Monday, July 13, 2009
i will put a stop to it.
7/13/2009 07:34:00 pm
so damn tired ):slept in sch for damn longzzxx anw iris sucks! its damn inaccurate lurh!! >_< the main point is bio was damn tiring. 2hrs straight. i keep falling asleep but everytime i wake up i give mr yao some ans then he was like saying that he will allow me to get powernap (: which of course was a JOKE :( then pe did 2.4km. wahlau shld have completed it but damn it la i had to fall down b4 the hols i did my 4stations and run and i passed with flying colours then the stupid jump screwed me i still have phobia of jumping lor >;( sbj caused me a finger and a shin!! scary :\ anw practisedfor sbj today. omg la i did 175 lidat. OMG FIRST TYM. i can do any station except tt. every yr the tchr tell me i m not jumping i am nt swinging. i swing damn kua zhang today and did 1.75m so when i take my napfa agn i will swing xueting as a monkey day #1 anw break quite shiok. ate with vivien chong qiaoyi n hongyun! vivien damn funny. she saliva conscious so she told chongloon i will put it in yours, you dont poke(your chopsticks) in here translate to chinese damn funny and SUGGESTIVE. and the main pt is my braces cut me today!! damn sian la! painful ): AND THE BIGGEST MAINPT IS I LOSE $4 TODAY >=[ I am a retard la. HOW CAN I LOSE $4. ARGH >=[ anw went for econs lect. STUPID AIRCON SPOIL. no aircon hw to slp you tell me! hah, but I slept anyway. and I was litening to "sry sry" by SJ agn! :P i listened using my phone. was like using my phone throughout the econs lect la. its the best time to slp la! 12pm after break. WAHAHA i make full use of my phone. MAXIMISE ITS UTILITY (: haha, i shall not act smart with the lil knowledge i have of econs ): then had break and went to the library (: AIRCON IS TOO GD TOO GD. then had chem and gp. OMG MY RESULTS GOOD GAME my econs might be my best sub this time round :D HELLO I CAN TTLY IMRPOVE FOR ECONS LA. CT WAS 30/100 I DUN THK I WILL GO LOWER THAN TT LOR! :P and have been msging bff the whole afternoon. thanks ah lee yishi YOU LAUGH AT ME for liking bob the builder :( so evil. NEXT TYM DONT ASK ME FOR DRAMAS TO WATCH. I ONLY WATCH BTB! hah, when you see this feel guilty! anw damn tired nao. just had dinner with dad (: WITHOUT MY MUM!! HAHAHAH :P gg to rest. mother tired. SCHOOL SUCKS! ARGH :( oh on the way home saw jiahao and we talked! HELLO NEIGHBOUR. he was damn funny la, ask me add him on fb. i did! so efficient! :D my lee min ho
7/13/2009 12:00:00 am
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HowcQWlR9IU&feature=relatedhe sang :D:D http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hzRO8iWjcWA&feature=rec-HM-fresh+div he looks yummier than what he is trying to endorse :D:D http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WmiIsOqwJwQ&feature=related if i m the director, i will NG forever so i can keep him in my studio :D:D BUT THE HARSH TRUTH IS.. LEE MIN HO SMOKES >=[ Sunday, July 12, 2009
my hobby is crying
7/12/2009 09:57:00 pm
no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no mood no moodok I am fine after spamming " no mood" for 5million times. Now my mood is picking up. woke up bathe eat breakfast meet bff took bus went svc eat ryan's seaweed chicken ate almond paste with rice balls went strikeforce went paya lebar bought food from ntus w justin n billy went subway told billy and justin a joke sat down ate and cursed billy talked to yingying went help out went home. reality hit me twice in the face today. I don't know what to feel anymore. and thanks yishi for calling me today (: I thk one day I will realise I am so stupid. You can tell everyone at my wedding that I once called you to ask you to call me so that I can cry over the phone over some retarded stuff, it going to be totally awesome, not. I am tired. my eyes are damn puffy. I M GG TO B FINE >=[ Not Meant To Be
7/12/2009 12:21:00 am
It's never enough to say I'm sorryIt's never enough to say I care But I'm caught between what you wanted from me And knowing that if I give that to you I might just disappear Nobody wins when everyone's losing It's like one step forward and two steps back No matter what I do you're always mad And I, I can't change your mind I know it's like trying to turn around on one way street I can't give you what you want And it's killing me And I, I'm starting to see Maybe we're not meant to be It's never enough to say I love you No, it's never enough to say I try It's hard to believe That's theres no way out for you and me And it seems to be the story of our lives Nobody wins when everyone's losing It's like one step forward and two steps back No matter what I do you're always mad And I, I can't change your mind I know it's like trying to turn around on a one way street I can't give you what you want And it's killing me And I, I'm starting to see Maybe we're not meant to be There's still time to turn this around You could build this up instead of tearing it down But I keep thinking Maybe it's too late It's like one step forward and two steps back No matter what I do you're always mad And I, I can't change your mind I know it's like trying to turn around on a one way street I can't give you what you want And it's killing me And I, I finally see Maybe we're not meant to be It's like one step forward and two steps back No matter what I do you're always mad And I, baby I'm sorry to see Maybe we're not meant to be moodless nao. 1. econs project 2. BOF 3. him & HER :( 4. I must still look at him and smile 5. I must still look at him and smile and pretend I am damn fine 6. It's 12.25 and I can't slp. Saturday, July 11, 2009
BOF withdrawal symptoms
7/11/2009 11:01:00 pm
argh mum came home and on the tv.srsly, I dunwan to watch the stupid bof de lor. but I gave in at the last part damn retarded to watch AGN AND AGN. it is just a fake unrealistic drama. blooooooooody koreans :( srsly if I am GJP, I will not give up Shinhwa for GJD. its silly. this drama makes girls think tt if they are as silly as GJD, they will marry a rich handsome guy. probability of the drama happening in real life? ZERO! its damn stupid la. I DUNWAN TO GO CRAZY. its damn ridiculous. the story is all about love, love, love even though its about students, THERE IS NTH ABT SCHWORK. then everyday is just heartbreak then patch then heartbreak then patch -_- thats why I dunwan to watch ABS BF. its like damn naise I know. but that is worse, its abt a robot's love for a human and I alrdy know tt the ending is a bad one. SO OBVIOUSLY I WONT WATCH >=[ I cnt stand sad endings. it bugs me. LIKE BOF. I am damn sad tt Jihoo din end up with GJD. as in I am sad because someone is hurt in the end. WHY MUST IT BE TT WAY. and the girl tt liked GJP had to leave because she wanted to give JD and JP her blessings. whole load of unhappy and non-happily-ever-after endings just suck ): anw yijung said in the show: when a girl can choose a bad or good news to hear first, she will choose the bad one first. cause every girl want a happy ending! mother true. I am spamming the song "something about you" by five for fighting. nice song. and its time to switch away from "because I'm stupid" and "sorry sorry". no more korean songs monopoly :P emo nao): back at home :D
7/11/2009 06:03:00 pm
okay eliberdy I am back at home liao (:from Bestie house! went her hse to stay over ytd. damn fun la. met her at 9 at tpy to go her hse. we bought prata to her hse to eat (: YUMMY! then went her room and just slacked till I bathed and we watched "My Queen" tgt! its a damn nice show! I will chiong it after A levels!! :D anw after 2 ep I am addicted la! Hah, its damn nice. the female is damn chio lurh (: super tall and sexy and has a damn sharp nose! she is rlly awesome. anw after the show we sneaked down to the kitchen to find food. not find la, she bought Bakerzin's CHEESECAKE :D so mother naise (: then we went to sleep ZZZ. had a damn hard time waking her up, she refuse to wake up lor. LAZY BUM! anw we ate breakfast tgt then I went for cg (: sat beside rayner today. he was trying to help me out during the game BUT I STILL KENA ANW ): and I rlly hate it when people dont accept the fact when they lose. I RLLY HATE IT. I mean its just a game, kena also wont die right -.- I get annoyed, irritated when someone loses and argues all the way. if you cannot afford to lose, then dont play lurh. Irks me to the max! anw after cg the girls were talking abt BOF (as usual) N399 and E492 has girls that are BOF siao. We love BOF. anw just thought tt this show is not meaningful. rachel and I agreed tt this show only makes you empty.. like you watch and its all about love, love and love. when a girl is attached and watches it, it will be just like another show but when you are single and you watch, you will just feel so empty! because there are no rich, handsome, nice guys in this world -.- or rather, even if they exist.. they are not our Mr. Right how many GJP and YJH are these in this world? and not to mention GJD. I thk what yishi's bro said is right! Rachel's bro said the same thing too. guys what porn to satisty their sexual needs, girls watch all those love-ly dramas to satisfy their emotional need. its totally true la. but not realistic AT ALL. I read "teens" just now, there was a report on BOF. and srsly what the report saidi s damn true.. "These pretty boys are so pretty they put some girls to shame" Like super own, its true. But wait THEY ARE PLASTIC -.- okay la, congrats them for a successful peration :\ I LOVE AND HATE BOF AT THE SAME TIME ;( for now, I will love my dinner (: RNDM I KNOW! anw I talked to Bff this week! haha first time I called him on the phone. AND HE HAD TO REMIND ME ABT STH. haha billy ong you good you watch out. I break ur bones someday! Hah, no I wont, you're so freaking skinny I am jealous! haha, and meeeet for dinner next week (hint hint) :D I am waiting for nutty's msg nao! she freaking msg me then when I replied she din! haha, I know you want to break SOMEBODY's record but pls dont!! :P anw I wanna thank Bestie for giving me SOMETHING :D thanks, its practical and useful. I freaking love it ok. will make goooood use of it :D I love you much :D and dont ever buy the wrong Vitasoy agn :D I love you and your BEAUTIFUL SOUL :D pics time! :D bestie and I at the bus stop. her hair totally damn brown!!! and her teeeeeth straight cause she took our braces alrdy!! me acting like a stupid tourist! you can see that her room overlooks the forest behind! oh can you? the super cute blanket I use everytime I go over :D its totally for me lurh! Wednesday, July 08, 2009
love
7/08/2009 10:58:00 pm
had a bad night ytd, cried myself to sleep.. saw it coming. if i dun release my tears in the day i will do it in the night :\had a relatively boring day. slept throughout econs. I own. the whole row was slping la, erm from tyas onwards i guess.. tyas shavi chong me nutty fel shiuan nevaa. honestly own leh. i took out my foolscap n pencil box but fell asleep then woke up cause i thought the pencil box was preventing me from getting my slp so i threw my bag and pencil case to the back cause behind me in the lt got no one (: went for pe lecture, mother boring. then ate break (: so happy la, finished yongtaufoo within 25mins!! with the stupid braces poking me :\ chong eat until damn kuazhang lor! sweat n sweat!! then had gp lect. i din slp ok. it was Mr Fong (: hw to slp!! anw he damn funny. he wrote "thomas jefferson" on the lt board.. then pris they all thought his name was damn big deal. thats the name of usa's first president if i m nt wrong :\ anw mr fong showed us pics of megan fox n zac efron. NO LINK TO PHILOSOPHY, but i like (: then went scc to slp cause damn tired. ended council early so went to see leong with daryl. cause he scared. mr leong noticed my braces lol, and he said " i can see your braces and your beautiful earring"... i was wearing some bright earring at the top ear hole :\ but he neh scold.. then went home (: bff came OVER! then we were discussing abt bof.. watched abit with her.. she progressed from ep 5 to ep6 at my hse (: ys: i like gjp now.. xt: actually i rlly like gjp is nt because he is gd looking.. i really like him for the fact that he really like jd.. ys: yes... damn own la, which girl wouldn't mind a JIHOO SUNBAE and a GU JUN PYO! (: i dun mind having both :P watching some channel 8 show nao. damn mother sad la.. the girl registered with the guy for marraige but before they hold the chinese wedding.. he died! then she is looking at his belongings and crying. EMO :\ life is damn fragile. anw the first thing i did went i rched home was to look for zchen new mv.. i was right. the new mv was about homosexuality. its abt 2boys liking ech other since young. quite sad ): Tuesday, July 07, 2009
enjoyed (:
7/07/2009 08:43:00 pm
ytd was fun! met Hy in the morning to get chong's present.OMG LA CHONG U ACTUALLY LOOK GD IN STH :P no la, the shirt damn nice. from topman worrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr :\ hah, from hy me and joyce mama! (: ate at cafe cartel with chong hy vivien and joyce! :D yummmmy, then went joyce's house to play w MUJI AND JUNIOR omg, the dogs damn cute la! so nice to hug, muji too cute (: we played truth or truth HAHA. it's damn fun to play all these, and dig secrets. but it stays within the CIRCLE OF TRUST. then bff came over to my house. thanks bff! :D she wanted to come over on sunday to cheer me up! but it was raining so i asked her to stay at home (: ytd I was fine! see bff I'm strong.. I won't cry anymoreee sch rocked today! :D only had chem. but damn omg la, I slpt in bio lect then mr eugene announced my name YOU GD LA EUGENE :\ bio sucked. oh yes, chem sucked also. LIKE I DID MOTHER BADLY. haha hy did arnd my grades la, i DRAGGED YOU TO HELL :P the main pt is I was fine today too (: chong damn nice la, he was like "you ok anot, want to talk? are you fine?" its alright bro, I am as fine as can be! I so brave please! haha.. listening to 張智成-暗戀四目交接的時候 不要停留太久適可而止的問候 關心不能太過 好奇也別去探索 嫉妒只能深鎖 如果忍不住寂寞 也不能對你說 啊好朋友啊我的好朋友 不小心的沉默 不能讓你太難過 我們就站在落地窗的兩邊 就算觸碰也有了界限 如果跨越過彼此那道邊界 是靠近還是更遙遠 相信我們走到另一個境界 搭肩高唱友誼萬萬歲 要是我愛你變成了語言 什麼會多一些 什麼會少一些 就讓別人去猜測 我們清白的很 就讓自己去承受 那種清白的悶 就算我只是朋友 能不能有要求 如果你發現什麼 還是我想太多 啊好朋友就只是好朋友 不小心說出口 微笑中藏著難過 我們就站在落地窗的兩邊 就算觸碰也有了界限 如果跨越過彼此那道邊界 是靠近還是更遙遠 你會不會也曾閃過這感覺 一念之間就要差一點 要是我愛你變成了利劍 什麼會被消滅 什麼才會復原 那是我的底線 繼續將你暗戀 it's a damn sad song lurh, but no worries, I am nt gg to cry or what.. I dunno why I am taking this so well this time. Hah, I think this is suppressed depression if sth triggers me, I'll be gone le la. I will go hysterical and cry a river I think I'll be fine till... ______ whatever dun wanna thk abt it (: I think I m gg to bestie house this fri (: whoooots! and next week gg to meet bff biong for dinner! yay (: anw ytd hear this on tv ytd 有种爱叫做放手 有种选择叫做放弃 Sunday, July 05, 2009
s. so. son. song
7/05/2009 11:45:00 pm
the tears just keep flowingthere is no way to stop I'm waiting for your call I'm dying to talk all I want is an answer to help me move on its time to say goodbye I am tatterned and torn would you even care about me to your heart, she is the only key I've been thinking about you I've thinking about me but I can't think about us I am not your cup of tea I am trying to breathe I dont think I can what I really long for is a touch from your loving hands all I want is an answer to help me move on still can't accept the fact that you're already gone would you even care about me to your heart, she is the only key I've been thinking about you I've thinking about me but I can't think about us I am not your cup of tea I am trying to breathe I dont think I can what I really long for is a touch from your loving hands shall continue second chorus some other time. brain dead. ): emo
7/05/2009 09:52:00 pm
Nae meoriga neomuna nappaseoneo hanapakke nan moreugo tareun sarameun pogoittneun neon ireon naema-eumdo moreugettji neoui harue naran eoptgettji tto chu’eokjoch’a eoptgettjiman neoman paraman pogoittneun nan chakku nunmuli heureugoisseo neoui dwaetmoseubeul poneungeotdo nan haengbokiya ajik naui ma-eumeul mollado kkeutnae seuch’ideusi kado niga neomu pogosip’eun nalen neomu kyeondigi himdeul naleneun neoreul saranghanda ipgae maemdola honja dasi tto CRYING FOR YOU honja dasi tto MISSING FOR YOU Baby! I love you! I’m waiting for you! neoui harue nan eoptgettji tto kieokjoch’a eoptgettjiman neoman paraman pogoittneun nan honja ch’ueokeul mandeulgo isseo naegen sarangiran areumdaun sangch’eokat’a neoui yeppeun misoreul poado hamkke nan utjido mothae niga neomu saenggaknaneun nalen kaseum sirigo seulp’eun naleneun niga pogosip’ta ipgae maemdola honja dasi tto CRYING FOR YOU honja dasi tto MISSING FOR YOU Baby! I love you! I’m waiting for you! Bye, bye, never say goodbye ireohke chapji mothajiman I need you amu maldo mothae I want you paraedo dasi paraedo niga neomu pogosip’eun nalen neomu kyeondigi himdeul naleneun neoreul saranghanda ipgae maemdola honja dasi tto CRYING FOR YOU niga neomu saenggaknaneun nalen kaseum sirigo seulp’eun naleneun niga pogosip’ta ipgae maemdola honja dasi tto CRYING FOR YOU honja dasi tto MISSING FOR YOU Baby! I love you! I’m waiting for you! [English Version] I’m really, very foolish I know of no one other than you you’re looking at someone else yet you have no idea of my feelings like this I won’t be in your days I won’t be in the memories either, however only you, I looked only at you and the tears keep coming As i watch you walking past, I’m still happy even yet you still don’t know my heart I should stop this and go I really want to see the day I’m withstanding the pain each day “I love you” is playing on my lips Alone once again, crying for you alone once again, missing for you Baby, I love you, I’m wiating for you I won’t be in your days I won’t be remembered either, however only you, I looked only at you I’m making memories alone Loving you is like having a beautiful wound I look at your pretty smile also but I cannot laugh with you I’m thinking about you so much everyday my heart is hurting in all these sad days ‘I want to see you’ is playing on my lips alone once again, crying for you alone once again, missing for you Baby, i’m waiting for you, I love you bye bye, never say goodbye even though I cannot hold you like this I need you, I cannot say anything more, I want you I keep on hoping too, I’ll keep hoping…. I really want to see the day I’m withstanding the pain each day “I love you” is playing on my lips Alone once again, crying for you I’m thinking about you so much everyday my heart is hurting in all these sad days ‘I want to see you’ is playing on my lips alone once again, crying for you alone once again, missing for you Baby, i’m waiting for you, I love you I am nt ok ):
7/05/2009 07:17:00 pm
alright man, time to face reality.okay must first apologise to bff. I M DAMN SRY I SHOCKED YOU :\ but my style is always lidat.. I will talk talk talk and supress then until buaytahan then i cry i think she has a strong heart so she is fine. HAH, I am not. ok I am gg to take it easy! it will not affect me (i thk) but I am alrdy affected. argh, mother. ok but I was just waiting for mtt to end then i called her. I plan to talk to her, relate stuff and tell her how i feel and blah i wasn't gg to cry!! then i damn loser AGN. but i went to the toilet and washed up no way am I gg to look like shit in front of strikeforce quite glad that bus 124 came damn soon! i boarded the bus and went to the last row ok i cried, i freaking cried on the bus. it was like worse than last yr. the last tym i cried on a bus, i freaked an uncle out. i thk i was damn tired la, i just cry n cry n i fell asleep luckily i woke up a few stops before my destination. and it was mother raining. but the rain can mask my tears. so pros and cons. was damn mother scared tt my mum will be at home, cause the last person i want to see me cry is her. then i have to come up with some lame excuse. actually I kinda expected today, ok i expected the event but just not today.. but whatever, some stuff are inevitable. part and parcel of life, so Xueting the Queen will move on. I must be happy. meeting Chong Hongyun n Joyce tml!! to celebrate chong bdae.. so no way m i gna ruin it. meeting ebc for dinner so president must be strong n happy. i will get over it by tonight. spamming 軌跡 now. i let out all my tears then i will be fine alrdy, i guess. emo time starts nao ): talking to bff biong nao, hah, cant believe i used "my contact lens dry" as an excuse. i mother loser ): Crush
7/05/2009 02:36:00 am
listening to Crush (AGAIN)I should move on from this song man! 1. it's old 2. it's emo-inducing ok I ran out of reasons :P ok man. r/s stuff aside. thking abt other stuff nao. I am damn LUAN. there are so damn many things in my mind. argh ): alright man, nt guna thk anymore. gg slp! 13x60+20=happiness (: are you holding back, like the way I do? actually I know whats ahead of us, the answer is there is nothing ahead of us. I mean there is nth ahead of me. and I think its stupid to keep thking abt you. Waste of time, energy and tears. I am damn sad, but I will move on. Because you alrdy did ): Saturday, July 04, 2009
FRI & SAT
7/04/2009 11:49:00 pm
just came back home from ting's house (:fri went dental wanted to talk to someone but at the same time dont want to see anyone. I msged ting cause I know she was at work, cnnt talk ): I called jas though.. I dunno why but just felt like calling her. but I guess she was slping! then din feel like calling anyone else. the dentist was evil. SHE HATES ME. I was so tired from chionging BOF i slept while she changed the colour. its not white anymore.. so cute right (: turqoise and yellow (: looks yummy! anw the dentist like damn evil la, damn pain.. I miss Dr Anna Tang! Argh! then went sengkang alone. dun ask why.. I just din feel like talking to anyone.. then went to meet ting and abel (: we ate dinner at PS and walked over to the famous Rocher Beancurd place! YUMS! then took bus home. they were psp-ing while I slpt! they say I treat the bus like my house siah :\ NO LOR WHR GOT. anyway saw Fulin and Yingrui on the bus!! Damn FATED(not), hah. had a great time with ting once agn. Jiemei 184! Sat (: met yishi and went cg! then had ebc outing. watched I LOVE YOU MAN goooodness la damn funny. and yes it should be NC16. content sibeh explicit. Haha! ebc took neoprints. my braces spoil everything la! ): but I still look gooooooood :P went dinner at ting's house w abel. we cook like no mother lidat in the end abel and I gave up on eating first.. she lasted longer than us. OWN my favourite was YOGHURT (: yums! (: I only love yoghurt. its damn nice. my source of calcium since I dun drink milk! I dunwan my bones to be brittle by 30! damn scary.. rched home at 11plus. mother tiring! ebc breakfast tml (: talking to Joshua, Jeanette and Bff Biong online. Bff is such a retard, he bully me LIKE SIAO. so mean lor. make me heartbroken. lidat still argue that he care!! KNS!! haha nvm, I get to throw drums at him tml during sf :P I missed last week de SF, must practice FHW ltr. I must be the own (: damn tiring. have been thinking abt stuffs these few days. I thk I am ready to let go. Alright man, enuff of emoness. I will be fine alone (: Friday, July 03, 2009
Xt back again (:
7/03/2009 11:49:00 am
OH YES I AM STILL WATCHING BOF!after mid yrs ytd, went with Chong to watch Z CHEN's concert in NP. Z CHEN DAMN OWN LA. he sing damn naise! and he super funny la, totally hyped up the whole atmosphere. then chong and I went bugis! Eat and shop shop! (: then came home.. reached home at 1030 watched my "The Brink Of Law" 2nd last ep lor. Damn hiong! then I started my chiong-ing of BOF. from 11 till 630 this morning. I went to bathe at 6am. I felt damn bad la, I was bathing then my dad thought I was going school! he wanted to make breakfast for me.. sorry Dad, you got it wrong, YOUR DAUGHTER DID NT EVEN GO TO BED. was damn scared mum would know so I slipped back into the room with as lil noise as possible. damn challenging la. then she din know anything. HAH, I woke up at 11 this morning because she called home asking if I want breakfast and I said no!! then I was watching BOF when she reached home. SHE THOUGHT I WOKE UP FOR DAMN LONG ALRDY sorry mum.. she ACTUALLY THOUGHT I HAD AN EXAM!! then wanted to buy food. aw man, seems like I should really go be syf actor agn!! HAHA stupid BOF make me cry like NO MOTHER. omg la I keep crying and crying.. anyway there is this libne inside that is quite meaningful: I like you. No matter how hard I try to not like you, no matter how hard I try to forget you, my efforts are so fruitless to the extent that I get angered by it.. gg for dental now. I PULLED OFF MY BRACES AWESOME. |
The (OWN)er
09 Apr 1991madly_in_love_4eva@hotmail.com pls do not laugh at my email :( 回到过去
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hehe haha hoho
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